March Madness.
I’m playing pick-up-sticks,
Each stick is a task - not necessarily simple but every single one is treated carefully and slowly.
Keep having faith.
"Never look back unless..."
03.
22.
12.
04:33 am
04.
15.
11.
03:59 am
High-res
Like an owl. I’m wise except when love co-exist. I can survive the storm, the predators, or even the baits set for me. I just can’t escape from you…
03.
26.
11.
03:52 pm
High-res
I can’t seem to rise up. I feel NOT tragic BUT something CALM-er than that electric jolt feeling in my chest. It seem to be AS painful AS physical pain… AS if I fell off from a STEP thinking about “us” (which I did- and it motherfuccin hurts). And from there, I can only choose to get up from the fall, or cars passing by might think, ” wadda hell this lil girl in a voochi attire laying down on the side road?” No one would know but me, that I fell thinking about you. But maybe, they know better than me that if no one is there to help me rise up from my fall, then…. again only they know or YOU know.
Good morning! If mom didnt help me get up from bed, Id just stay here the whole day.
12.
02.
10.
09:05 pm
watermelon flavored italian soda.
As I was ordering my drink at Freudian sip, I thought I should order watermelon flavored italian soda. As I was drinking it, I realized it has no flavor. But when I asked someone to try it for me, he thought it was delicious. Now that I came to think of it, maybe I’m just starting to be really affected by this separation. I have ordered his favorite drink, yet I couldn’t taste it as if I’m in denial. I continously hurt that there’s still hope even though I was the one that let go. I really don’t know what I want, what I need, and I don’t even know what I should do. There’s so many things going on around me such as family/health issues I should be grieving on. I do, but I just really wish that before I totally break down, there would be that one person who will take care of me as I take cae of others. I really can’t do this alone. I’m trying to be strong, but everyday there’s more stress that adds to my worries. I wish all these worries is a watermelon flavored italian soda that I can simply throw it in the trash because it has no flavor.
12.
14.
11.
07:16 am
#Threehundrefourtyeight days.
A year of lunacy,
three hundred forty eight days today,
disparagements reserved gone astray,
instead converted into certainty.
Inescapable mortification,
since hidden esoterically,
To deceive or desire transformation,
I think I have made my decision.
Dear 2012,
I’m looking forward to a new beginning.
With set goals and projects all planned out,
All I really need to do now is face it with POSITIVE attitude. <3
06.
22.
11.
05:01 am
No resolution.
Its all past, you can never turn back, Passage way is blocked. Tear, sweat, and fear shed to clear, all the effort used to build that feel.
Fuck it. Im long forgotten and judged. What did I do again!? Fucked up my life, therefore I should further be punished by my own friends. But once again, all I got is myself.
04.
10.
11.
04:38 am
High-res
I cannot stop questioning myself. I thought I was made of steel but it seems not. I tested my durability when I let myself fall, and I break. I just hope you don’t mind… I never told you.
03.
24.
11.
06:44 am
High-res
It is 3:45 in the morning and I’m still awake. What’s my excuse!? Supposedly, I’m studying for a midterm which is approximately 7 hours away from now. In a matter of fact, if I’m really studying right now, I’d be knocked out instead. Oh boy! Why am I thinking about you? Only if my test is on you, I’d definitely ace it.
P.S. blogging on my new phone rocks! :)
11.
26.
10.
07:35 pm
moving on.
enough with all the dramas. enough with all the stress. NOW, look forward to what’s coming whether they are good or bad. past stays at the past. present is what you achieved, so work on it. future will come to you for the better if you want it to. you are not to waste time to people who does not cherish you, but spend it on people that shows magnificent love to you.
Realize one thing, everything has an expiration date. even life does. so don’t say a feeling can live forever, because you might think so, but for the other person, it’s all over. so wake up, wake up! face reality with all your might, you can do it. so wake up, wake up! strive for the things you didn’t have, so you can go ahead and show them, I’m better off without you. So wake up, wake up! People like your father, did many good things for you to become a better person, so become one and stay strong.
So I’ll wake up to be a better person and become a happy one, so goodbye sadness and depression, because soon enough, I’ll be soo over you. <333
